A lifestyle blog from a forty-something mum

Thursday, 26 February 2015

A Million Miles from Home

I love you so much, maternal loveThe phone rang yesterday morning and I was surprised to hear daughter, Olivia on the end of the line. As it was early in the day for her to call, I sensed that all was not well. She mentioned that she'd been feeling poorly for a while and her condition had deteriorated overnight. She was having difficulty breathing and also burning up. And it's times like these that render you helpless as a parent when you're 250 miles from your daughter at uni and wish that she hadn't ventured quite so far from home. I suggested she take some Ibuprofen and make an urgent appointment to see her GP.

Had she been to the GP surgery in her uni hometown since starting back in September 2013? Nope. Did she even know where the practice was? Nope again. I told her to call a taxi and promised to call her back at 12 pm.

Olivia might as well have been a million miles from home for all the help I could offer. I'm still fiercely protective where my daughters are concerned and yes, I know they're all grown up - it doesn't make it any easier. I warned my husband that I may be gone by the time he arrived home from work and distracted myself with mundane tasks in the house to kill time while I waited to call her back.

Fortunately her GP was brilliant. She prescribed antibiotics and steroids and dished out great advice about telling her housemates that she was unwell. She was also instructed to go straight back to the surgery if she had any concerns whatsoever. And I am so grateful for the excellent care Olivia received. It's reassuring to know there's help available, especially as this was the first time she'd been to the surgery and she's so far from home.

Later in the day we Skyped and had a longer chat. Olivia was planning to take a nap having slept badly the night before. She'd taken 40g of Prednisolone, her first antibiotic and a couple more Ibuprofen to keep her temperature down. She still looked poorly though and I offered to drive down. "Mum, I'll be fine," she said.

Does maternal instinct ever disappear I wonder? I guess not as my daughters are now 20 years of age and I still revert to type whenever there's a problem. We'd previously done a frantic dash to see Sophia just 6 weeks after she left home for uni. How I turned my back on my youngest daughter and left to return home after sorting out her problems I'll never know. By the time we arrived home I was an emotional wreck.

In my eyes when my daughters are sick they might as well be 4 years old. Us mums do stuff - ferrying to doctors appointments, dishing out meds and hugs as required, making food to tantalise them with and anything else necessary to help our offspring recover. That I can't do this makes me feel useless. Having said that, Olivia's shown that she's more than capable of sorting herself out in a crisis and I guess that means she's growing up.

I have just rung my daughter again and I'm happy to report she's feeling slightly better today. Yesterday, she confessed to watching CBeebies on BBC iPlayer and curling up on the sofa while her housemates were at uni. I only wish I was there to give her a hug. It's what we do. For the record, it doesn't matter whether they're 4 or 20 years of age.

Get well soon hun x

Until next time...

Copyright©2015 Izzie Anderton


  1. Oh, Izzie - know exactly how you feel. Beloved Daughter broke her toe the other week. "Right," I said, "I can be there in two hours." Wife had to restrain me...
    Hope all is good apart from that.

  2. Aww! Bless her and you! I can't even imagine being apart from my girls when they are poorly but they're only 7 & 12. I hope she feels better soon x

  3. Ahhh hope she is completely well again very soon. I'm convinced that instinct doesn't go away, I'm not 35 and my mum worries a lot still if I get ill... Then she tries to pack me even more food than usual :)

  4. My boys are still little - and I dread the day they end up living miles away (just like I'm doing - I even moved cointries!) because I am sure that maternal instinct never fades......

  5. Oh hun - hope she's getting better. I hate it when Lucas is poorly and I have to still go into work - I might as well be a million miles away then!! Love reading your posts as they always give me an insight into how life is going to be like with Lucas as he grows up x #pocolo

  6. Grace & Lucas say - You mums are AWESOME when we're poorly and we can't imagine wanting anyone else when we're ill................ even when we get big!!! Get Well Soon, Olivia xx #pocolo

  7. I usually call my mother when my son is sick and I am asking what to do. She is in the Philippines and I am here in the UK. I know she gets worried but its her who I trust with sickness. I love her smile everytime I tell her that my son is getting better. Mothers are just the best to call. Its nice to know even if they are miles away that someone is thinking of you. #pocolo

  8. I can imagine how hard it must be when your children are unwell and away from you even when they're grown up. Hope that Olivia is better soon and I love how CBeebies is still comforting when they're unwell even at the age of 20!

  9. I hope she's feeling well again really soon, yes there is nothing worse than a sick child no matter what their age, and it's worse if they are no longer at home xx #PoCoLo

  10. Oh bless her, I really hope she gets well soon. I don't think the maternal instinct ever disappears - my Mum still worries about me, even now! And I think I wil be the same with Grace.Thank you for linking to #PoCoLo

  11. Oh I hope Olivia is feeling much better now. You must have been so worried. It can't have been easy - resisting the temptation just to get in the car and drive to her immediately! xx

  12. You'll probably still feel the same whether she's 40 or 4! I dread the day when I'll feel helpless as a mother to help one of my kids with instant hugs and close proximity.

  13. It's almost harder when your daughter's not so far from home - my youngest is at uni only 40 minutes away and if anything goes wrong it's so tempting to jump in the car and 'nip round'. Thank goodness though for mobile phones and skype - when my eldest was at uni phone calls were once a week pre-arranged events!


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